PEACE

IF PEACE ON EARTH
IS BUT A PASSING DREAM,
WE CONDEMN OURSELVES
TO LIVE AN ETERNAL NIGHTMARE.

c. 2011 Fred J. Scheyd



IF WE DO NOT LIVE IN PEACE,
WE HAVE ALREADY DIED.

c. 2011 Fred J. Scheyd

IF I COULD CHOOSE

IF I COULD CHOOSE
ONE PLACE TO BE,
ONE PLACE TO SPEND
ETERNITY,
I'D CHOOSE THE CROSS,
THE FOOT OF CHRIST
THE LORD MY GOD,
MY GOD,
THE DAY HE DIED.

Sincerely,
FJS

BLOGGING SECRET WEAPON

I happened to catch a brief clip of biography when actor Steve Allen died a while back. Mr. Allen wrote many -- MANY -- books during his lifetime. He said the secret to his writing so much was that he carried a small TAPE RECORDER with him everywhere he went, readily available to capture his passing thoughts which then more easily developed into his books.

THANK YOU, Mr. Steve Allen, for this invaluable jewel of information and advice. I am indebted to you and I am certain you don't mind that I share this wisdom with the blogosphere. God Bless to you, Sir.

Sincerely,
FJS

JUST ONE STEP AHEAD

I opened the early post I'VE COME TO REALIZE with "Life is short. It passes by very quickly." Indeed it does. My ex-wife died of brain cancer at 58. My best friend's husband died of a heart attack at 52. My sister-in-law's brother was murdered in his 30s. I gave a eulogy some years ago for a 6 year old child who died of heart failure. The concept of this current post is that people who die are Just One Step Ahead of the rest of us. None of us are very far behind. We will all get there in short, due time -- some sooner; some a bit later; but all of us will get there ... relatively speaking ... Relatively Soon.

I have a few memories of when I was 6 years old. I remember these as though they occurred not yesterday or even last week, but perhaps a few weeks ago, or a few months ago, or at most a few years ago. In fact, it was a half-century ago that I was 6. I am 56 years old now. I am clearly over-the-hill. I am beyond halfway home. I will not see 112.

My parents are up in age now. My dad is 89; my mom 82. Their bodies and minds are not working so very well for them as in years past. My parents raised 8 children and it is now time for us to circle the wagons and provide the support that our parents require. A benefit of having so many children -- perhaps the only benefit? -- is that the children (hopefully) will be available to the parents in their time of need. Four of my brothers and sisters live out of town from my parents. They are not physically available to our parents at this time, but they do provide much concern, good ideas and strong emotional support to all of us. I am beginning to organize a rather loose version of Circle of Support (refer to the post TOUCH ONE LIFE DEEPLY-2) among my brothers and sisters on behalf of our parents.

I spend about 40 hours per week now driving a delivery route for my current work. I travel from Southwest Louisiana to Northwest Florida. A lot of time on the road -- city streets, back roads, highways, interstate. I pass many -- MANY! -- roadside memorials to those who have died in automobile accidents. I'm sure I have passed several hundred memorials in 3 years of driving the route. Passing these memorials always reminds me that I live by the grace of God. It would take about a split second for something to go wrong on the road and for my life to quickly end. I am always saddened to pass these memorials, and I am always frustrated by the obvious lack of safety that so many drivers flaunt.

I'm not suggesting that I am the finest driver in the world -- but I do TRY to drive safely. I am not suggesting that there would be no automobile accidents if everyone drove like me. But there would be A LOT FEWER accidents! A LOT FEWER needless deaths!

I have an idea that I would like to see happen, but I personally do not have the time to get it going. I hope someone reading this post will take my idea and run with it -- make it happen. I wish I had the time when I pass a roadside memorial to stop my deliveries just long enough to jump out the truck, say my prayers for those deceased, and take a photo of the memorial. Then post all of these memorial photos on a blog or website. I would like it to be a collection both of my local region/state and expand to include photos from across the nation. A national memorial dedicated to prayer for those who have died on our roads and their families and friends. A reminder to all of us that life passes by quickly and that we should cherish each moment ... and that we should DRIVE CAREFULLY!

Many people drive as if they never expect anything to go wrong -- not with themselves, their vehicle, or the people or vehicles around them. They are either very selfish or idiots or both. They leave NO ROOM WHATSOEVER FOR ERROR. They drive 70+ miles per hour, bumper to bumper, car after car. A frequent thought while I am driving is ... SOMETHING VERY EASILY COULD GO WRONG IN A SPLIT SECOND AND WHAT CAN I DO TO PREVENT IT AND HOW AM I GOING TO RESPOND IF IT DOES. I pray to my guardian angel often and I thank God every day for keeping me safe from harm -- so far.

Ernest Becker wrote a brilliant book entitled "The Denial of Death". The bottom line is that all of us are trying to find someone or something or someway to outlive our death. Someone or something to leave behind when we are gone. Someone or something in our wake. It could be a family, a child, a painting, a bridge, ... anything ... so long as it outlives us. This effort is what gives our life meaning and purpose beyond its limited self.

I do thank Google and all the Blogger geniuses and workers that make this FJS Thoughts blog possible. This represents for me in many respects my "denial of death". It is my effort to leave something behind. Something that may be of some value to someone, somewhere. I am constantly reminded as I watch close family members and friends die and as I drive past roadside memorials ... that these people are Just One Step Ahead of the rest of us. We are all not so very far behind.

Sincerely,
FJS

BLAST OFF!

I wrote in WHAT IF A PRIEST?, "And what if you quit your job working for the church? And you stopped going to church? And you stopped practicing the faith? And you stopped going to mass? And you stopped receiving the sacraments? And you stopped participating in the community? ... for these and many other reasons." 

This is as good a time as any to mention some of these reasons. I do not pretend that any one or two of these mentioned are very good reasons for me to stop practicing the faith. They are reasons, yes, but not necessarily very good reasons. But when I add these up to a sum total, I am left with the realization and personal decision that I do not want to associate with or be affiliated with these types of people. 

I continue to have much faith in God the Father, in Jesus and in the Holy Spirit. I remain for the most part Roman Catholic in my theological understanding and belief. But I do not feel close to the Catholic Church as an institution, or in many of its traditions or day-to-day practices. 

The following items concern what others did or did not do that I took offense with. It is a relatively brief accounting -- I could have made it much longer. I realize I run the risk here of being quite arrogant. "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone." I do know God DOES NOT like arrogance. I also know God DOES like honesty. Here I am being quite honest. I will mention in some future post a few reasons closer to home -- my personal psychology, so to speak -- of why I no longer actively participate in the Catholic community.

--the priest who always and at every chance stared down crying infants and their parents during his homily, refusing to speak another word so long as the rude interruption to his wisdom continued. Perhaps it never occured to this priest that the infant was simply voicing what many others were feeling about his not-very-wise homily.

--the several priests and deacon who continually put down -- no, more like condemned! -- people who are divorced and those who are homosexual. Oh, by the way, one of these priests was the one who requested my affection as mentioned in WHAT IF A PRIEST?. Not once did I hear mentioned that perhaps people who get divorced did love each other deeply but something went terribly wrong. Not once did I hear mentioned that perhaps people who are homosexual actually love each other deeply. Remember? ... God is love. Remember? ... He who abides in love abides in God. Remember? ... The gospel!

--the old lady telling me after Sunday 12:00 mass as Hurricane Katrina approached that she had nowhere to go but home and that she would have to trust God. She died in the storm. I don't remember the priests ever inviting those in need to come to them for help.

--the priests telling the shell-shocked congregation after Hurricane Katrina, "Move back home. We did." Nothing at all like "These are very difficult times and decisions. Pray. Do what is best for you and your family. Whatever you decide, we love you and wish you God's Blessings."

--the deacon -- of above average financial means -- who had volunteers gut his home very early on after Katrina. I can't help but think that there were people in more genuine need of that limited volunteer resource at the time.

--the priest leading the Sunday Mass "Prayer of the Faithful" with a prayer for the New Orleans Saints football team to win their playoff game.

--2 widows crying in church to me of their Katrina losses who said they had nowhere to turn for help. I'm not aware that the parish priests did anything to attempt to make a list of those in need or to reach out to them in any way.

--the priest making a fuss over the tennis shoes a young altar server wore, apparently not caring that the boy likely lost everything in Katrina and perhaps a pair of nice dress shoes was not a family priority just yet.

--the priest flicking water into an altar server's face because he didn't like the way the server held the fingerbowl out for him. Oh, by the way, the server was somewhat "slow" and likely a special-ed student. I was standing right there. I wanted to deck the guy right in the middle of mass!

--the brilliant talk given by the assistant-principal nun to a church full of elementary school children. She spoke several minutes after mass instructing them that the only truly Christian names come from the Bible or from the saints of the church. Modern names like Mattie, Maggie, Terrel and Terance just don't cut it -- not Christian, almost a disgrace. Not sure what she wanted the children to do about this sad situation that many of them obviously did not have a good Christian name: Go home and sue their parents? Demand to be driven immediately to City Hall to legally change their names? Brilliant, Sister!

--after listening to 6 years of daily homilies I can recall about 40 seconds worth. I don't want to say that most of the homilies I heard were terrible but most of the homilies I heard were terrible.

--I notice the parish spared no expense in rebuilding after Katrina, but continued to pay me a ridiculous low wage (in my opinion) considering the value of my service to the parish. I was expected to be there and on-call morning, noon and night, 7 days a week, with no backup.

--I worked 3 full years without a day off. Not once did one of the 5 or more priests or brother who lived 2 minutes from church ever offer to open the church and set up for the daily morning mass, or to set up for the daily evening mass and lock the church afterwards. Most parishes have 1 priest who does that for himself often, if not every day. If I had that generous relief offered even once or twice, I would have felt like I died and went to heaven. Not so.

If I wanted to I could blast myself for this BLAST OFF. What about all the good priests? What about all the good people? What about all the good works? What about Jesus and the Blessed Sacrament? What about the Holy Spirit guiding the Church in matters of faith and morals? What about my own apathy? And my own sin? And my own soul? I sense I've already said enough -- for now.

Sincerely,
FJS